Am I potentially about to mess up my recommended feed because I’m looking at a ship I used to like? Yes, yes I am. Will I stop looking at it? No, no I will not.
Funny things to consider about NoirPunk:
The electric guitar was invented in 1931, two years before current Noir year, so Peter probably saw Hobie’s guitar for the first time and was like ‘what is that? why do you carry it everywhere? what the hell is a ‘rockstar’?’
Well now I just want a fic where everyone is jamming out and Noir comes in and is like “I know how to play acoustic, how different can it be?” And throws out the most epic riff because he actually does know how to play electric, idk how but he does.
You Are Odysseus
So
I’m a teacher of Classical Civilisation that has taught the Odyssey for over a decade and studied pretty much every myth and story with Odysseus in it.. I think
and I’m writing an Interactive Fiction (choose your own path) version of the Odyssey, inspired by the Homeric phrase “he turned his great heart this way and that”, where you are Odysseus, allowing you to follow his decisions or make your own
and it already has 500 sections to it - written to emulate modern translations of the Odyssey, including the literary features of simile, formula, epithet, and the rest - and 21 different ways to die, and quite a lot of period and theme-appropriate alternatives
(and if I get time, the option to be Telemachus or Penelope, although that might have to wait because it’s already a monster)
and I’ve tested what I’ve made so far on my pupils, other Classics teachers, and some of the leading (and best-read) Greek Mythology podcasters and YouTubers, all of whom have universally loved it (yay!)
(EDIT: Oops and I presented on it at the Classical Association conference last year)
I’m trying to finish it this summer, but need a bit of encouragement to do so
EDIT: and I forgot to say that ideally I’m planning on it being a beautiful BOOK with an old-fashioned cover and lots of ribbons to mark your place ❤️ (ex-bookseller ofc)
so, please let me know if you’d like to know more!
(EDIT: or sign up here go get notified directly when it’s ready: https://ljenkinsonbrown.wordpress.com/you-are-odysseus-signup/ )
TL:DR I’m writing an Interactive Fiction /gamebook of the Odyssey (with lots of alternative options, all based on existing mythology and the text) and trying to finish it this summer - please reblog and/or sign up if you like the sound of it so I can try and get it published!
I like to imagine that everyone treats Noir like a whole ass adult (and Noir never seriously corrects them because he thinks they're calling him old because he's from 1933), so one fine day Peter B takes him to a bar casually and then:
Noir: Thanks for ordering the drink, i couldn't do it anyway.
Peter B: It's ok pal! Hard times I know, Great Depression and all.
Noir, while drinking his beer: Actually, I'm not old enough to drink.
Peter B:
Noir:
Peter B: FUCK YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH TO DRINK
Noir: Thanks for ordering for me, technically I’m not “of age” in your universe.
Peter B: …I’m sorry- what do you mean your technically not of age in my universe?
Noir: well the legal drinking age is 21 here, right?
Peter B: wait so… your not like- 35?
Noir: What? No. I-I’m 19.
Peter B: WHAT?
Later
Peter B, visibly shaken: Guys… how old do you think spider Noir is?
Miles: Idk like 40?
Gwen: i thought he’s like 29.
Pav: I think about 30ish.
Hobie: 35
Miguel: He’s 35, isn’t he?
Penni: I thought he was like…25?
Ham: He’s like, 45, right?
Peter B: he’s 19
Everyone: WHAT!?!?!?!?
Peter then goes on to explain how he found out Noir was 19
Jessica: Wait so- did you let him drink?
Peter B: I mean… he’s from a time when its legal.
Miguel: Seriously Parker?
Peter B: I only let him have like half of it! I’d already paid for it at that point.
Everyone: *exasperated sigh*
Penni: wait- doesn’t he smoke?
Would u guys think it’d be weird if I did a little analysis on the Torah and noir 😭😭😭 I feel so insane doing this Torah portion thing
ok im putting it in my drafts because comparing peter parker to moses makes me feel absolutely batshit. but if u were curious about just the torah portions themselves:
What torah portion you get depends on your birthday. I was using 2 different days because noir doesn't have a confirmed bday. I was going w him being 17, so he'd be born in 1916. August 10th is a common peter birthday because that was his first comic appearance. Noir's first comic appearance was December 17th, so I through that one in too.
If he was born Aug 10, 1916, his torah portion would be the Vaetchanan.
If he was born December 17th, 1916, his torah portion would be the Vayeshev.
and just to cover all my bases, since December 17th is really late in the year & would only make him 17 for a few days of 1933, If he was born December 17th, 1915, his torah portion would be the Vayechi.
My interest is piqued. My Torah portion had been the one where the 12 brothers throw Joseph into the pit. My synagogue did the split it into three thing. But anyways the point i made in my divar Torah was that in that part, if you thought of it as a game everyone is playable except for Joseph, who in this case would be an npc. Doesn’t really have anything to do wth spidernoir, but seeing you mention the Torah got me hyped lol.
either y'all have forgotten or just accepted noir is voiced by nicholas, fuckin, cage? or y'all just don't wanna talk about it. either way, i appreciate y'all not talking about it.
He…he’s voiced by Nick cage?
Sometimes I imagine what it's like in Noir's world and Stella Jangs song "Villain instantly comes to mind
Like the lyrics just fits so well!
Like I weirdly think he would actually vibe with the song if he heard it
Some things are black
Some things are white
You shouldn't look through colored lenses
[...]
Your boring world is in black and white
So many shades of grey
[...]
We all pretend to be the heroes on the good side
but what if we're the villains on the other
[many more fitting lyrics tbh]
I just really love the song and whenever I hear it I just daydream about Noir (and sometimes my OC in his world)
That is legitimately one of my favorite songs! I didn’t realize how well it fit him until now lol
I’m finally playing the he shin summer event and I was climbing one of the buildings and joked to myself “did Kaveh help design here?” And then I go talk to Idyia and Eula and Idyia mentions a blonde architect had helped her redesign. How did I know?
>standing outside the city of troy deciding whether or not to take the giant wooden horse the greeks left behind into our city
>ask this guy the greeks left behind if the horse is based or cringe
>he doesnt understand
>pull out illustrated diagram explaining what is based and what is cringe
>he laughs and says "it's a good horse sir"
>take the horse inside the walls of troy
>it's cringe
Ok but I need the diagram of what is based or cringe. Please help me.
Finally! Here’s my contribution to the Valor Anthology, “Bride of the Rose Beast”. Valor is a book I’m still so happy and honored to be a part of, and you can still get the 300+ page ebook HERE for $5! Enjoy!
So cute
shipseekingshippers
